How to Cultivate Healthier Frendships
WELLNESS
How much do you think your friends influence your way of life, your choices, your decisions? A study by Dr Nicholas A Christakis and James H. Fowler showed that if one mutual friend became obese, the other had a 171% increased chance of becoming obese too. It’s not about how we were raised it turns out but, rather, about who we hang out with.
How then do we bring healthier influence to our social groups?
Share new experiences with your friends
Went away on a work trip? Give them feedback. Make them feel like they were actually there with you. After we travel, we rarely come back the same, so tell your friends about it. If you can, bring back souvenirs. When we grow with our friends, we strengthen the bond, leaving very little room for judgement. I say judgement because when we’re no longer at the same place with our friends, we can feel judged. There’s always someone feeling like their friends are holding them back and another feeling like their friend looks down on them.
Talk is cheap, inspire through action instead
Even as children, we learned more through imitation than instruction. Want to get in better shape? Start by ordering a salad instead of fries on a night out with friends. Even our highly curated social-media content is influential. If your friend posts a photo of them holding a glass of water with a slice of lemon instead of red wine; that gesture, filters and all, is more likely to inspire you to make a change than you would have had they asked that you join them in taking a break from alcohol.
Pick the right friends in the first place
The truth is, having healthier friendships begins with having the right friends in the first place. Your friends are more likely be open to making better lifestyle changes when they share the same values as you. When you make new friends in adulthood, treat this new encounter the same way you would a date — get to know them first. Their manners, the company they keep, how they spend their free time. This is how you’ll realize their values and what’s important to them.
Your friends are the family that you get to choose so, choose wisely and maintain these second family ties.
